Notes from a session run by , Chaplain at West Middlesex University Hospital
Listen with openness to what the person is saying. Try not to be defensive. If you can 'weather' their feelings, they will feel safe with you, and it will be a gift to them.
Listen to the feelings beind the complaint. Let people 'vent' their feelings. Probably no one else has listened in this way to them until now. Often this is enough and no more action needs to be taken.
Try to imagine how you would feel in their situation, and reflect upon whether to share this with them.
In your mind, hold a balance between these two possibilities. Indeed, both may be true.
We quite naturally want someone to blame, but in illness there maybe no one to blame. Illness is simply part of life. Part of our job as chaplaincy volunteers is to give a listening ear to these feelings, and to say in word and attitude that it is ok to feel these things. Sometimes this is enough to deflect someone from a complaint. There's no need to be defensive; no need to argue: just really listen and affirm the other person's world.
Discuss if and how they want to take their complaint forward.
Remember to ask for permission before making a referral.
Sometimes it is possible to have a word with ward staff to voice your concerns about a patient. You may not need to seek the patient's permission for this if you are only voicing your own concerns and not revealing what has been told to you.
Don't forget: supervision is always available from one of the chaplains, should you wish to talk about a sitiuation. Find out more about it in the page on supervision